Do The Right Thing?
It is so interesting to me that at time folks that work their best to do the right thing suffer the consequence, directly and indirectly, of others that push their luck, limits or just blatantly do some retarded ish. How many unsung stories are there of people that put their best foot forward only to take one or two back because of another’s tom foolery or whose plight just gets overlooked altogether by being overshadowed by some jackasses futile ways.
My family at times is a source of this type of agitation to me, all too often. I have family members (yes more plural that I wish I had to tolerate) that choose to do some truly moronic things only to be rewarded by being supported financially and emotionally in their journey to suffer the consequences of their ignorant and more so infantile choices. Lawd, grow the eff up! I have watched some of my folks do some ghetto @$$ stupidities knowing there would be karma to pay while ignoring familial imploring and straight warning signs. Their haste towards brainless activity and refusal to conceive the price to pay for such behavior is exasperating. I have seen thousands upon thousands of dollars over the past 10 years wasted on the defense of the guilty and irresponsible. Granted, I do recognize the entrapments of our society and injustices of or legal system, but damn yo! Come on! How many times do you have to get arrested for doing the same shit before you figure out that those actions are going to put you right back in the same digressing position time and time again? How many times do you have to come to a fork in the road, take the same left turn, realize it took you to the wrong place, end up at that fork and keep choosing the same turn? How many times do you have to beat your head against a brick wall before you realized your giving your self a painful concussion before you stop? This applies to everything from dope dealing, tax evasion, dead beat parenting, speeding tickets…you name it, this rule is applicable.
Last year I got 4…count them F-O-U-R speeding tickets in one day on the same street. That’s right, sure did, no lie. That’s where my arcade style, Indy 500 driving skills put my foolish @$$ and when it rains it pours. I had to go to court for each and everyone of them different days a few times. I handled that on my own without crying to my folks or boo-hooing for a lawyer, because I knew I was in the wrong and whatever might happen as a result I was completely and solely my fault and responsibility. Now even though I beat all four tickets, I have changed my driving habits by always carrying my license, cooling down the speeding considerably, and watching my street signs a bit more carefully etc. I changed my ways, gladly. I was spared and decided not to risk getting caught out there like that if I could help it. That’s a natural progression I think. I have always kept in the back of my mind something me government teacher in high school told me. “Ignorance is not an excuse. It’s your responsibility to know.” This is true even for the straight no chaser plain ol’ ig’nant and especially for the consciously ig’nant.
So upon hearing that my sister in-law needs 2G’s by tomorrow because she doesn’t want to take a day off of work to deal with one of her 2 court cases please excuse me for thinking, “wow that’s the cost of one of my classes. What an expensive boo-boo that needs a band-aid.” It is astonishing that a situation like that created from precarious behavior tends to supercede the intentions of a person that by any means tries to prevent objecting not only self but family from such situations. Now I know my couple of parking ticket doesn’t compare. I know people make mistakes…but incessantly the same mistakes for other to fix? Does responsibility mean anything any more. Now this isn’t the only area that I see this. Wherever one neglects their responsibilities there is and will be problem. It doesn’t matter whether they’re civil, parental, educational, moral…whatever the case.
So excuse me for being annoyed and acutely agitated with observing people make some jacked up foolio decisions and watching people that give me tough love, jump at the oh so immediate request that they help clean up the quagmire, immediately. While I myself grovel for the little things that are less expansive to help my forward motions. Lets just forget any reciprocity of positive movement in the right direction, and personal growth. Now, I know that it is not good for one to compare because there are always greater and lesser persons than oneself. But it appears to me that good guys DO finish last. I guess I’ll swallow that as long as I finish and win. But hey I think the reward is the ability to sleep at night without some craziness looming over my head and haunting my thoughts. It actually is compensation not to have to suffer the consequences of stunted logical abilities. And it’s always nice to not have to as for much if anything at all of others. It’s great not being a source of stress!
Once again I have to remind myself that it’s not so bad being the tortoise in all the slowness of assured and solid steps. Quick steppin’ hares fall off and loose in some way, I guess. But all the senseless fuckin’ up I see really gets on my last gatdamn nerve. (forgive my profanity)
But then how do we not compare? We compare ourselves when addressing inequalities. We compare ourselves when building relationships with like minds. We compare ourselves in our ambitious aspirations. We compare ourselves as parents to our parents. And the list goes on and on. I wonder where is the balance between comparison, judgment, and self-actualization. Is there a balance?
slowinmyroll.
